Sinister Regard : July 2014
            

The good folks over at Sinister Regard (chaotic good, that is) have twisted my arm into telling you that a handful of my old books will soon be made available as ebooks on multiple, not to mention in some nice new print-on-demand editions. This includes not only the books that are already available but also a couple of others that have never before been seen. Watch this space, as they say, for more details.

Now excuse me. I'm off to get me some Obamacare so I can have that twisted arm looked at.

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I've told this story many times, in many ways. This particular version was written for The First Time: First Crime, an evening of readings at Second City's Up Comedy Club in Chicago on April 17, 2013. I read it again at Tuesday Funk #61 on September 3, 2013, and later posted it as an answer on Quora (to the question "What are you banned from? Why?") and as an essay on Medium (where it became an Editor's Pick). As long as it was available for free in those places, I figured it ought to have a home here too. So here it is. Happy Canada Day.

They caught up with me in the men's room of a bus station in Great Falls, Montana.

Now, the fact that "they" were after me might lead you to presume that I was running from the law, that the cops or other authorities were hot on my trail, but that's not the case. My felony was still two months in the future at that point, though I was on the lam.

I was on the lam from the Mormon Church.

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The Accidental Terrorist 30th Anniversary Sale

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